Bachelor Party Planning: 10 Steps to Pull Off the Best Bash for Your Best Bud
Does bachelor party planning have you all like…?!? We get it. If you’ve been asked to be the best man in an upcoming wedding, you’re likely trying to figure out what all of your responsibilities are.
Women seem to have this innate sense of what to do with things like weddings and wedding parties. How do they just spring into action the moment they’re proposed to, or the moment they’re asked to be a bridesmaid?
For one, they all seem to be pretty darn excited about it. Like, they seem to genuinely enjoy everything they have to do, from all the planning and handholding to fittings and events leading up to the wedding day.
Also, there seem to be a lot more guide books and planners for bridesmaids and maids of honor than there are for groomsmen and best men. What’s up with that? As if they need any more ideas or help with something they already seem to be pretty good at…
Well, there is a lot that goes into a wedding and it can get overwhelming and tedious, but we know one thing you can for sure get excited about – the bachelor party!
While many women dream of their wedding day for years, the bachelor party is pretty much the equivalent of that for the groom’s best friends. Who doesn’t want the opportunity to plan all the wild shenanigans for their best bud’s final bash as a single man?!
And on the guide book front – we’re hooking you up. We’ve got a step-by-step how-to to help you out from beginning to end with all your bachelor party planning. Let’s get to it!
#1 Talk to the groom
Before you do ANYTHING, the very first step you should take is to talk to the groom. You need to do some recon here. Even if you think you know the groom pretty well, you need to have a deliberate conversation about what he’s thinking for his bachelor party.
You don’t need him to tell you what to plan, because that would take all the fun out of it. But you do need to get an idea of the general vibe he’s envisioning for his bachelor party. Every bachelor is unique. His personality set aside, he may have a set of circumstances that could affect how he’s thinking of his bachelor party.
For example, does he already have kids? Or is he as free as a bird? Does he have any other obligations that he would rather prioritize over going all out for a one-time party?
Just feel him out and see if he’d rather do a one-day kind of party or a whole weekend. Would he like to really get out of town, like hop on a plane and go across the country, or is he feeling something a little more local?
Who does he want to come to his bachelor party? Is it just his groomsmen or are there a few outliers he’d like to invite? Get their names and contact info.
Then get a list of dates of when he’s available one to three months before the wedding. Just get all the possible dates that work for him so you have options to take back to the group, because you’re going to need them.
For this step, you may even want to talk to the fiancé. Is there something she may be able to shed light on that the groom may not be considering? If they do have kids, you’ll need to make sure you’re getting dates for not only when he’s available, but her also so they have childcare.
The groom will likely factor things like this in with the dates he gives you, but it’s this kind of thought that’s going to set you a part and step you up as the BEST best man there ever was.
#2 Reach out to all the guys
Once you have all the info you need from the groom, you’re off! You are officially in bachelor party planning mode. You’ve got all the ammo you need to get this party planned and to make it the best experience of the groom’s single life.
You are now ready to initiate contact. Email is probably the best method for the first touchpoint, but you’re not going to want to stay on email for long. Think about how many emails you would be exchanging and how long that string could get. Annoying.
In your initial email that you send to the group, introduce yourself and make sure they know who you are and why you’re reaching out to them. Give them a general idea of the info the groom passed onto you, but don’t go into too much detail in the email because you don’t want to encourage a lot of back and forth on this platform.
Tell everyone you’d like to get the planning going on the HeadTable app to make it easy on yourselves and stay organized. HeadTable allows you to create profiles, send messages as a group or individually, and save events and appointments in a shared calendar, among many other cool and helpful features.
Ask if everyone could download the app (making sure that you, yourself, have already done so) and invite all the guys to your wedding party group on the app.
Once everyone is on the app, then you can really start to get things going.
#3 Set a date
Your first order of business is to send out all the dates the groom gave you for when this bachelor party could possibly go down. Ask the guys to respond with all the options that work for each of them.
Ideally, and usually, you will land on at least one date that works for everybody. If not, you may be forced to go with the date that works for most guys, but make sure you go back to the groom at this point and make him aware of the conflict.
Not to be catty or anything, but if it’s down to two different dates and a different guy has a conflict with each, the groom may prefer to have one guy attend over the other. Don’t feel like you necessarily need to make that call.
Once you have your date selected, whether it’s for a whole weekend or a single day, make sure you give that to the groom as the final and only date he’ll need to continue holding.
#4 Ask about budgets
Okay, now for the least fun part of bachelor party planning. Money is never a fun discussion, but it’s definitely necessary. Every guy is going to have a different idea of what he’d like to spend to attend this party.
To make it easy on yourself, think of the spending options as three different categories: low-budget, middle-budget, and high-budget. Pick a random destination just for budgeting purposes and do some quick research on the absolute cheapest places you guys could stay.
Then scope out some high-end places – nothing obnoxious – but places that would give the bachelor party a bit fancier of a vibe. Then do some simple meal and activity calculations ranging from low-key and maybe fewer activities to bigger deal and more activities. Add it all up and come up with a figure for the middle-budget option.
Send out a message to each guy privately, and give them the three options, making sure they know these are ESTIMATES and just for you to get an idea of what kind of bachelor party you’re planning.
Once every guy has selected a budget option, go with the one that most people chose. This is for your eyes only – so that you can make sure to manage the spending levels and ensure the options for stays and activities that are being considered are in line with the most popular budget as much as possible.
You didn’t make any promises, so at the end of the day if it’s looking like the bachelor party is going to need to cost a bit more than some of the guys’ budgets, they should understand. They know what they’re signing up for.
Remember, the groom doesn’t pay for anything.
#5 Put feelers out
Once you have an idea of how much you can expect each guy to contribute toward the bachelor party, you can start talking actual plans. You’re going to need somewhere to stay (if you’re planning a weekend trip), things to do, and places to eat.
Sometimes, within a group of guys, someone has some kind of a connection to a beach or lake house or someone knows someone who can get you great tickets to that football game. Send a message out and ask if anyone has anything like that, throwing out ideas of things you can do and places you can go for this bachelor party.
This will also kick start the actual planning among the group. If someone does have a resource you can all use, that will help guide the rest of the bachelor party planning.
#6 Decide on the plan (narrow down all the options from your bachelor party planning)
Make sure you determine how much help you want with the planning. Do you want it to be a free-for-all and let every guy be a part of every detail? Or do you want to make certain judgement calls and then put the rest out there for group consensus?
Things can get tricky if there are too many cooks in the kitchen. It’s always best to try to guide the discussion/planning. For example, throw out a few solid options of locations that you think could work, perhaps in a group poll on HeadTable, and allow the majority to rule. Just make sure you’d be cool with any of the options.
Once you have your location set, you can move on to activities. Consider your group’s budget, and then do some research on what’s going on in the location you chose for the date you settled on. Don’t worry if nothing special is happening like a game or a concert.
If you’re going to the lake, a great option is to rent a boat. If you’re doing the beach, jet skis can be really fun, but a simple beach day always goes over well. Research some fun places to eat (which can be an activity in and of itself), read reviews, and find out what’s popular for drinks and maybe some clubbing.
Once everyone has agreed on the plans, you can set things in the calendar and breathe!
#7 Make reservations
If your bachelor party planning includes dining out, make sure you make reservations if possible, especially for a large group. This is why it’s crucial to start planning as early as possible, at least a month ahead of time (but ideally three to four months before).
You should also consider the time of year and location that you’re planning the bachelor party for. If it’s fall or winter in Florida, that’s in-season and you’ll likely need to plan even earlier to make sure you get all the reservations you want.
If it’s summer up in Maine, same deal. Hot spots like Nashville, Austin, or Vegas tend to always be in-season, so you’ll really need to plan ahead if you’re considering those places.
#8 Decide on a theme
While not necessary, a theme can help to liven things up and add some spunk to the plans. If the groom is a diehard fan of a particular NFL team, consider adding fun fandom touches to the party like cutouts of different players plastered around the place you’re staying at and t-shirts with different numbers/names from the team.
If you don’t want to commit to one theme for the whole weekend, you can also do theme nights. Luau or suit and tie nights are always a win. This is where bachelor party planning can get creative and really personal.
Whatever you do, just make sure not to overdo it. Make it tasteful, minimal, and more like a background for the main event. It should not be the main event, unless of course the main event includes going to an actual game or going to Hawaii (if that’s what your budget looks like!)
All we’re saying is don’t make it look like the theme threw up all over your party all day or all weekend.
#9 Secure the gifts and decorations
Another bonus element, that’s sort of come to be more expected nowadays, are gifts and decorations. If you have a theme, that’ll determine your decorations. If not, think streamers, balloons, party hats, etc.
These can be as goofy as you want them to be – the point is to have fun with them.
Small gifts for each guy attending are definitely a nice touch. Personalize t-shirts or koozies that make it known you’re all in town for a bachelor party. Cheap, funky shades are a go-to if you don’t know what else to do.
Try to think about the groom, the location, and what the guys might actually enjoy or use beyond the bachelor party, although that’s not a must. It’s still nice to have a little something they can enjoy just during the party itself. Gifts are typically not split among the group. This is an expense the best man usually incurs.
#10 Party like you planned it
Last but not least, have a great time! If you’ve followed Steps 1-9, you’re in GREAT shape. Just keep a few things in mind and you’ll be successful:
Steps 1-3 are the most critical to get started right away
Respect varying budgets as much as possible, but within reason
Use your resources, whether that’s help with the planning or free/low-cost accommodations or activity hookups
Don’t recruit too much help that you have strong and perhaps conflicting opinions on every little detail
Don’t overdo it with the cheesiness
Finally, remember to sit back and have a good time. You put a lot of work into this and you deserve to have fun with it too. If you’re having fun, chances are the rest of the guys and the groom will have a good time. The groom is definitely going to have a ball because of all the thought and effort you put into his bachelor party planning.
